DanPar's bedtime story!

In case anyone needs to know, or if I want to remind myself later, this is Daniel's bedtime story.

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[Four canvas pictures of superheroes on his wall. Put hand-phone up to ear.]

"One day, Spidey called his friends and said, 'Guys! Guys guys guys! Let's go to the hot air balloon library!' "

[Put other hand up to ear.]

" 'That sounds great!' said Cap." (Or some other variant of an enthusiastic OK.) "So he got on his helicopter, and went..."

[Shuffle around room with one hand on a flight stick and the other circling around like a propeller.]

"Thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup-thup."

[Handphone again.]

" 'I'll be right there!' said Iron Man. So he got on his bicycle and went..."

[March around the room with two hands in front on handlebars.]

"Hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh."

[Another handphone.]

" 'Great! I'll see you guys soon!' said Spidey. So he got in his car and went..."

[Turn on ignition, shift from Park to Drive, and steer around room.]

"Vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom."

[Last handphone, I promise.]

" 'Looking forward to it!" said Hulk. So he got on his skateboard and went..."

[Hop on skateboard, go off ramps, be extreme.]

"Hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh-hwsh."

"So they all got to the library, and Cap went to the play kitchen. 'I'm gonna make you guys food!' he said, and he got some eggs, and lettuce, and macaroni, and put them in a pot and stirrrrrred it up, and gave it to Iron Man.
'Egg and lettuce and macaroni soup? My favorite! Om nom nom nom!' (The food can be any combination of anything. Whatever food comes to mind.)
Then Cap got some bread, and put some bacon on it, then put some chicken on it, and then put some mayonnaise on it, and then put one more piece of bread on top, and gave it to Spidey.

'Bacon and chicken and mayonnaise sandwich? My favorite! Om nom nom nom!'

Then Cap took the muffin tin, and put carrots and grapes and mustard in them, and baked them in the oven, and then took them out and gave them to Hulk.

'Carrot and grape and mustard muffins? My favorite! Om nom nom nom!'

And then Iron Man went and got a book, and the rest of them sat down for story time."

[Here, you pantomime opening the pages of a book that's basically as big as a poster, and pointing to pictures. The last pretend book I "read" him was about Oswald the Bear, who likes to hug rabbits, and then they throw a surprise party for him. DanPar loves this part with the big imaginary book.]

"And then Hulk and Spidey got the wind-up cars, and..."

[Daniel pretends to wind-up cars, and then you speed your hands at each other's until-]

"CRASH!!!"

[Hands up in the air, then gather up the cars and do it twice more.]

"Then they all decided to go play Legos!"

[For this part, I just have Cap and Iron Man and Spidey and Hulk build their respective vehicles out of Legos, describing where the wheels go, and doing the little sounds for it.]

And then right here is the audible. Sometimes DanPar wants them to do something else, like read another book, or build a table, or make something else with Legos.

After that, the superheroes all clean up their messes, putting the kitchen stuff away, putting the books back, putting the cars back, and putting the Legos back. Then they all say something like "What a fun time!" or "I hope we can do this again!" or "I'm so happy we're friends!" or "You guys are the best", and then they each go back to wherever they came from.

"And then Cap said, 'Nigh-night, Hulk. Nigh-night, Iron Man. Nigh-night, Spidey.' "

"And then Iron Man said, 'Nigh-night, Hulk. Nigh-night, Cap. Nigh-night, Spidey.' "

"And then Spidey said, 'Nigh-night, Hulk. Nigh-night, Cap. Nigh-night, Iron Man.' "

"And then Hulk said, 'Nigh-night, Cap. Nigh-night, Iron Man. Nigh-night, Spidey.' "

"And they alllllll got in bed." [With all the insinuation of "now it's your turn, mister" towards DanPar.]

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And that's that! Now you know how I do it! It takes about ten minutes, which is crazy, considering all the actual books in his room take three minutes at most. I always try to convince him it'd be a great night to read a book, but he insists on the superhero story.

DanPar loves it. He interrupts all the time, asking questions, which I make up answers to. For example, Spidey's car is light red, kind of like pink, but more red than pink. And he sits down for storytime, he reminds the heroes not to actually eat the food Cap makes, because it's pretend food, and he even has his own car that he'll gesture to in the corner. It's dark red. And tonight, when Hulk was skateboarding back home, DanPar pantomimed opening the trunk of his car, pulling out the skateboard, and closing the trunk, before hopping on and going off the ramps with Hulk.

The boy's imagination is limitless. I just hope I can continue to cultivate his creativity, feeding that joyful fire of his. He is wonderful.

The hot air balloon library! (You can see the hot air balloon in the background there.)

He made a race car! He needed my help for the roof. I think it looks nice!

The bag

No one's going off and telling anyone I'm the epitome of alertness and vigilance. Sometimes I do something like leave a diaper bag at the library.
So, it got stolen.

That night, I had my friend Ashley over. We retraced every step I took, I struggled over what to tell Jessi. I wasn't exactly sure it had been stolen yet. It was just possible that this Good Samaritan was just taking their sweet time returning it.

Throughout the night, and into the morning, I looked at the doorstep, and checked my phone. In the diaper bag was some odds and ends, some Brush-On sunscreen, my wallet, my keys, and a few diapers, including a dirty one. I told people I hoped that the thief had dug their hand straight into baby poop, although I didn't. I just wanted them to return it. I was too full of an emotional cocktail of stress and guilt to be angry.

I reported it missing to the police, and the very next morning, we got the locks changed for our house and for the car. It was all surreal. I'd stopped the cards, after they'd made two purchases at the King Soopers I go to, but before a big $300 one at Walmart.

It was all okay. It cost us money, but we were safe. No one was getting into our house.

And then Monday morning, I get a call from a church nearby, wondering if I'd lost my bag. I was back into that surreal feeling again. I herded the kids into the car, and picked up the bag. My credit card and debit card were gone, as well as seven dollars cash. But those were easily replaced. The only other thing they took was the sunscreen. (And I can't blame them, it's GREAT sunscreen.)

So, someone had taken it from the library, took the money stuff from the wallet (they missed the $100 Sprouts gift card, thank goodness), and tossed the bag in the parking lot of a church. And you know what, there's something to that. I'm not nominating the thief for a Nobel Prize anytime soon, but they put the bag into the possession of an organization that, standing for literally the Almighty of good and glory, would return it to me. There's something to that. It was wrong, but not malicious. They could have dumped the bag in a ditch, or in a public trash can. But they didn't. And I'm really grateful. I'm honestly more grateful than I am angry. And I hope they someday find themselves in a place financially where they don't have to steal. And I hope they repent. And I hope they put the sunscreen to good use.

So, there you go. The story is written down now! Here's pictures from the day!

"Hee hee! Hoo ha! Hee hee!"

On the way to the library, we stopped by King Soopers to eat blueberries and Goldfish!

At the library!

He has no idea what he's doing with his computer, but he sure looks cool doing it!

Windy windy day at the park!

The little guys running around!

Sweet dudes.

Good use of a cookie cutter! Turkey sandwich and PBJ ninjas!

The Train Adventure of March 2018!

A few Fridays ago, it was a normal morning. The boys were doing something silly, and I was exhausted.

 They had, on their own, poured out toys from their little colored bins to use as stepstools, and were "doing dishes." I love these boys. They make me proud every day, especially when they try and mimic the chores I do.
But when I'm exhausted, there's only one cure. We have to go. Somewhere. Anywhere. It was a nice enough day. So I piled the boys into the car, and we started driving. Ten minutes into the aimless drive, Crash Boy fell asleep. So I drove by Cherry Creek reservoir, so DanPar could look at the boats floating by. Hell if I know how I got there, but it was a nice drive. After passing back and forth over the reservoir, the little guy woke up, and we went home.
Except I was lost, and when it comes to South Parker and North Parker Road, I have no idea where I'm going. So I took... well, the wrong one. I still don't know the right choice. And so I tried to do a U-turn, but couldn't, and so I found myself pulling into Nine Mile station.
And, well, I know I'm lazy, but doggone it, I know when I stumble into an adventure. So I bought a round trip train ticket, and we were off!

Yes indeed, nothing quite as stressful as entertaining two young, mobile children in between TWO RAILROAD TRACKS.

He isn't wearing socks. However, he is wearing "mittens"!

Wearing his biggest smile!

Two things in this story say "I don't know what I'm doing" very clearly. My first chosen stop is number one. The Denver University campus. My thinking was, "I had fun in college, I bet my kids will love it!"
As it turns out, they did, but these sweet boys would have enjoyed an abandoned warehouse. It wasn't MY alma mater, so it wasn't like I had any real sense of nostalgia, and it wasn't like I had any right poking my nose into these buildings. Besides, it was a Friday morning in March. It wasn't like college kids were practicing cheerleading or throwing a frisbee. Finally, we got to the Ritchie Center. I've been a few times, all graduations, and so, somehow, I felt a little better going inside. Of course, there wasn't anything for kids to enjoy. (Not that I thought.) We just used the bathroom. But DanPar and Crash had a BLAST. There were displays of old DU athletes that Daniel asked about, and I expertly read the captions. And then there was a little ramp. And there was a hill. And there was a tree. And my sweet boys, full of the joy of being alive in a world where everything is new, loved it all.

Wandering around campus!

The belltower!

Going down the hill!

And now we come to the second "clueless" moment. It was noon, their naptime was soon, and we were just leaving the campus. We still had to go to the train, take it back to Nine Mile, and drive home. Not only that, we hadn't even had lunch yet! I figured I'd microwave some chicken nuggets or something. Buuuuuuuuuuuuut, I was a little busy taking pictures of my sweet boys, and talking to some talkative stranger about aquaponics... and I missed our stop.

Hard to pay attention with these guys!

Everything's new on the train!

We missed our stop, then took a different train to a whole other place, with a fountain! (They didn't care. I thought it was neat.)

Dad packs PREPARED. Uncrustables! Oh, and we got a pizza from a corner deli place.

So cheesy!!! (But I wouldn't recommend it. Pizza is never bad, but it was unspiced. Even the mass of cheese on top can't make up for a missing dash of garlic and oregano. Luckily, the kids didn't mind.)

Finally on our way back!

We, eventually, after four train rides, made it back to Nine Mile. Both kids EXHAUSTED, but happy. DanPar and I worked together to keep Crash Boy awake, which in turn kept DanPar awake.
I'm not sure how the rest of the day happened. More than likely, I was beat, the boys had a crappy nap, and their bedtime was all weird for one day.
But that's just it. I don't remember that at all. It's probably what happened, but it's not what matters now. In the permanent record, all I have are the smiles of my sweet children, pictures of them sliding down a hill, and the pride of having an adventure even when it wasn't easy.