It's been a while since I've felt young, but today? I feel young. I've got some stubble that looks out of place on me, and sure, I'm balding, but my face just looks light!
I think I've been doing a good job trying to keep myself up. And that's something! It's been hard. Especially since Echo turned two, and decided to start screaming (SO LOUD) about everything that upsets him, which now includes when his brothers don't let him steal their toys.
They're a handful! And they're hard. Crash Boy has apparently forgotten how to poo in the potty, and Daniel loses his cool more often than he should, growling, hitting himself, and just being short-tempered.
I try to keep my head screwed on right. I try to take care of myself, and I try to make time to clean the house (a thing I like to do!) while the kids are around. They're demanding, but they're used to me and Jessi telling them no, that we're busy.
That all said, yesterday, Daniel and I played a little game with Legos, each of us playing a character from the show Grizzy and the Lemmings (like a modern day Wile E Coyote and Roadrunner). And doggone it, it just felt good to be making stuff up with Legos.
Having kids young is awesome! I can keep up with them, and I feel like I've still got vim and vigor! Although, at the end of the day, I'm still exhausted. Being the parent of three young boys takes all I've got and then some!
But doggone it, I'm important, too, and I do what I can to feel like a human being. I've got my editing business, which can't really grow any larger, because I don't have much time for more! I've been doing my positive nonsense, my Little Delights, as a practice in positivity, a way to get people talking, and a way to just have a thing that's mine. I've got Dungeons and Dragons, and I've got my own campaign that I'm running, and all my players say that it's a ton of fun!
This is a big pat on the back for me, because I'm keeping my chin up, even when I'm stressed. And I know I'm stressed. My sweet boy DanPar, he was reading a book on emotions, and when he came to "stressed", he was like, "Hey, that's what Dad is all the time!" Hahaha, oh, sweet boy. I'm rather proud that he knows, because it's important to name one's feelings.
I'm stressed, yes, but I'm staying positive, by gum, and that's nothing to sniff at! I feel like I'm living my life, and in these times, when it's hard to justify getting out of the house, and most my energy is spent keeping up with the little ones, I feel great about it!
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| DanPar taught Crash how to swing on a swing when we weren't looking! |
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| The boys playing Sorry! with Mama. DanPar's getting a bit silly with it. |
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| This sort of thing gives me hope. Echo threw a rock at Daniel while he was on the swing, and after a little cry, Daniel laughed about it and commemorated the occasion in chalk! |
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| Happy goobers! |
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| Echo's ready to cause havoc with the unpacked Ikea shelves! |
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| That smile. He's a mischievous little rascal, but he's at least a cute mischievous little rascal! |
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| Crash Boy made his own "witch's hat"! |
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| I've got my game shirt on! One of these days, I plan on being muscular, because I'd love to be the hunky nerd who plays Dungeons and Dragons. |
I act with more patience than I actually have, and speak with more positivity than I've actually got. I used to dislike the phrase "fake it 'til you make it", but when it comes to my attitude, that's a good half of it. The other half is all procedure and discipline. When I feel like I might lose my cool, I wiggle my toes and pay attention to them for a little bit. I always keep a book nearby so I don't just zone out on the Internet. I have a list of friends who I want to make sure I don't lose touch with, and I will sit down and bang out an email to make sure I don't! I want to get myself into the routine of being a better person than I am right now. After all, that's how I grow into those big shoes!
