DanPar, Crash, and Echo!

I have three great boys. They are great because they play well together, they nap and sleep at the same time, and they are sweet.

Sure, Echo isn't exactly "playful", but DanPar and Crash love to play with him, and DanPar puts on big ol' Mama sunglasses and makes faces at the littlest baby boy, and it makes him break out in a big smile!

The napping speaks for itself. Echo no longer falls asleep on my chest, which is a shame, but I'm glad I took full advantage of that while it happened. I can sort of make Echo nap whenever I need him to, with at least an hour's preparation, and the other two basically tire each other out in their room until they both fall asleep! Also, Echo sleeps through the night! Whaaaaa? Not looking forward to sleep regression, when he starts waking up again in the middle of the night.

And they are sweet. Sometimes they forget that they are sweet when they are sad or angry or tired or cranky, but on good days, (which most days actually are!) they'll give hugs to each other, they'll help each other build and play, and they'll be so excited to see people they love, which is a large circle of people!

They are great boys. It makes me proud to be their dad, and while I really think I'll enjoy it more when they're older, I'm really enjoying things now, too. The future is bright, the present is manageable!

Lots of love and lots of sweetness!

-Woody

One good-looking dude!

My jeans don't fit, and it's hard to find shirts that are long enough without being too loose.
But let me tell you, when I've got the right outfit on, I look goooooooooooooooooooooooooood!

I shaved today, and I am handsome as can be! I'm really happy that I've lost the weight I've lost, and I'm down to 195! Sure, progress down has slowed, but if I have to spend time at one end or the other, spending time while being not-fat (my self-appointed ranking) is definitely nice!
Think about this. Earlier this year, I was obese, according to my BMI. (Right? Damn!) Now I'm overweight, but juuuuuuuuuuuuust barely! Once I hit 189, I'm "normal"!!!

So, here's to me, the studly Dadmaster! Keep up the good work, you awesome guy, you!

The New Normal

Every morning, DanPar and Crash wake up, usually between 5 and 6, and sneak downstairs while we're still snuggled up in bed, either with Echo or still snoozing from a night dealing with Echo. They come down to find a small breakfast, normally a couple peanut butter jelly sandwiches with fruit and water. They'll make a mess of things, but it's worth the extra hour of sleep. Then they'll run over to the living room, dump out ALL of the Duplos, and start playing with them. Sometimes they'll get into little fights, but they handle themselves all right.

Inevitably, however, I'll need to come down, round them up, change them out of their wet diapers, and make sure they did a good job with breakfast. Then it's me time. Coffee, bathroom, clothes. In that order. Coffee, man. Really clears away the cobwebs.

When Jessi comes down, it's usually the time when the boys and I are heading out the door to do some shopping or something. The boys tend to get antsy after being stuck at home, and so I do what I can to try and encourage Jessi to get up and moving without being pushy. (Although I tend to be a little pushy.)

Because the boys go to bed around noon, we end up doing a very short shopping trip or going to a storytime at the library, and then coming home soon afterwards for lunch. After lunch, the boys head upstairs for a nap, which usually means playing around for an hour or so, getting a talking-to, and finally nodding off.

Jessi and I tend to busy ourselves with projects. Cleaning, putting away laundry (SO MUCH LAUNDRY), and I've got three books I'm currently editing! Also, I'm working on a story-by-mail with a few other people, called The Consul's Destiny. It's a lot of fun, because it's the sort of thing that I can enjoy imagining about when my head hits the pillow. If you ask me, everyone should have a thing to daydream about. And personally, I like planning out these daydreams.

When the boys wake up from their nap, we've got just enough time to play at home, but it doesn't work well with going shopping or running errands, so we spend good quality time reading, and playing together, much more than in the morning, when my priorities are more on getting my bearings. The boys love to play, love to laugh, and love to have fun.

Dinner comes, and we usually have something ordinary and less-than-homemade. We make rice sometimes, hot dogs, chicken nuggets, the sort of things that are very low-effort to cook. Honestly, we need to start getting into a better rhythm, but it's tricky. Jessi's picky, DanPar's picky, Crash Boy likes to make messes, and I tend to not eat. (Part of my Sad Woody Diet.)

The sun goes down, the boys go upstairs to play/sleep, and Jessi and I move onto more quiet projects. Some putting things away, writing, and, when we're all done, we're tired, Echo's awake, and we watch Call The Midwife on Netflix. We're in a pattern where we tend to go to sleep late, because when Echo falls asleep around 9, it's so nice to spend that time awake and doing things, and every day feels like a weekend to me, because Jessi doesn't work the next day!

It's been a lot of fun, and it doesn't seem all that hard, these three boys. I'm sure I'm wrong, but I'm happy right now!

The Little Baby Echo Guy!

If you ask me, Echo was our easiest kid. Jessi, however, might tell you otherwise. When the boy's time in the womb was about up, and the midwife said that there was a quick and safe procedure that might speed things up, her eyes lit up! Of course, though, she asked me my thoughts. And I was honest. "You know, I'm supposed to help my buddy Brian brew some beer on Saturday, and if we have a kid now, I'll probably miss it. It really doesn't matter, it really is your decision, but you asked for my opinion, and there it is."

In the end, we went for it. And that night, we went to Noodles and Company. Tasty stuff! We picked up the boys from the Carbal's, and went home. They went to bed, and Jessi was in labor. We didn't really know that until her water broke, and we had to call over the neighbors and ask Mom to look after the boys!

There was traffic, almost didn't make it, needed an epidural, blah-dee-blah. In any case, I had a good book, and the night after he was born, I had the best rest I'd had in months, and as of writing this, the best since! Man, I felt GREAT.

Oh. And there was a baby, too. He was pretty cool! Cried, pooped, slept, ate... really, he's been like that his entire life. He's been very content. He likes to be held, and we're all too happy to oblige. he eats well, he spits up well, and he sleeps all right.

Now to the pictures!

The breakfast before Echo was born. Only these two boys, enjoying muffins and yogurt, and reading magazines!

The last picture of the boys before Echo came, playing baseball on the WiiU!

Mom holding the little boy! 

Crash Boy was shy at first, but he's grown to love the little Echo guy.

Such a new little boy. I'm really happy with him.

On the second night, he was crying, and so I held him, and we dozed off.

Finally snuggled up at home!

DanPar loved Echo from the first time he saw him.

The boys loved the buttons to move the bed!

DanPar came over when I changed Echo, and gave him kisses, and quietly, calmly, said, "It's okay. It's okay." Such a sweet guy.

Looking at their newest little brother!

Baby hiccups!

Me and my boys! I took this picture so that I could print it off for a party I went to that evening. Let me tell you, it's wonderful to have a photo to show off. It makes me smile.

Silly little boy, getting burped!

Such a sweet boy! Boop! Boop boop boop!

Me and the Echo guy.

Echo loves his Momma.

Tummy time done right.

Taking a bath at home! He is VERY calm about baths.

The blanket thing is a strategy from the nurses at the hospital. It seems to work!

Sweet little snuggled up boy.

Crash-a-Boy, 2 years old!

It’s hard to believe that we’ve had this little guy for two years now. On one hand, he was such a little little baby guy, so how can he already be so big? On the other hand, I can’t really remember a time when it was just me and DanPar. (It sounds so simple!)

He's not a clingy guy. He's perfectly comfortable wandering off to play with a kid he's never met. But when he's upset, he wants to be held FOREVER. And when you're too busy to hold, he'll stick his hands out in front like Frankenstein with a big pout on his face. Of course it's sad, but it's ADORABLE.

He likes three things in life: yogurt, family, and whatever DanPar likes. He'll follow his older brother around like a baby duck, and it's just the sweetest thing. It was interesting how on our adventure a couple weeks back, I found myself out of conversation topics. I just couldn’t think of anything he’d actually be interested in! So, instead, we wandered around Golden, and he’d point to stores, and we’d wander in! I think he’s just as clueless as I am when it comes to his preferences, but we both enjoyed the simple joy of doing new things.

He's not a risk taker, at least if you were to ask him. He jumps off of the couch with his whole heart, not a worry in the world, but he doesn't think it's actually risky! DanPar will do dangerous things knowing they're dangerous. Crash will do the exact same things because hey, if his favorite older brother's doing it, it couldn't turn out bad, right? The boy's legs are often bruised and scraped, and he just got over a nice black eye.

He's not as much a talker (DanPar does enough for the both of them) as DanPar is, but  he’s just as much of a smiler. Ever since  he started actually eating, it’s like his social switch just got turned on. He loves to do things you ask when you structure them in a happy tone, because he so loves to please. Except, of course, when he feels like being a rascal, and he’ll say “No!” in the most adorable little voice, and run off laughing. I am certainly raising a couple of goobers.

A few rapid fire favorites:

Food: yogurt, animal crackers
Animal: elephant

Color: orange
Restaurant: Chick-Fil-A (but only for the playplace)
Dessert: someone else’s ice cream
Song: What Does The Fox Say?, by Ylvis
Toy: Tanker truck Duplo (Thanks, Uncle Hodey!)
Book: Ten Little Ladybugs
Shirt: Superman shirt
Word: “Outlet”
Hobby: Putting shoes in baskets (sometimes even the right ones!)

All in all, he’s just a sweet little guy who loves it when everyone is happy, and loves to run around and smile. I’m proud that he’s mine.
:)

Making a case for things!

Okay, stoplight paragraphs are wonderful.

Allow me to make an argument:


I think it's weird that some toys say "I love you".

• There's a certain humanity to the phrase that can't be explained by a toy.
• It's important for children to hear the phrase, yes, but it's more important to hear it in correct context, otherwise it might affect how they think about the concept of love.
•   "I love you" can be comforting or calming to hear, so sometimes you'll hear it from bedtime toys.
• But having a toy say this sort of emphasizes the comfort part of the important phrase, and takes away from the true meaning of it, which I think involves two living parties.
• I could totally get behind you recording your voice into a toy, when the kid recognizes it's you, and when you truly do love said kid.
• Even if the toy manages to elicit some loving feelings from the kid, toys break.
• It's dangerous to have a toy, which can be lost, broken, or taken, be entrusted with the emotions of a kid.
• I've heard stories about kids who have been through hard times and develop close feelings to their teddy bears and stuff; that's a bit better, because they are imbuing the toy with this magic, as opposed to the toy saying "I love you," which I'd say is trying to get the same feelings from the kid.

It's understandable if you disagree, because it's a strange thing to think about, but these are a few reasons why I think it's weird for toys to say "I love you".

There was a time of my life, after the huge confidence boost of high school, when I believed that my writing could do no wrong, and that the best way to write was to just speak my mind, and let it go. As a result, college was a lot harder than it should have been, because I'd forgotten how to rightly make my point.

So it was during my last week of teaching before leaving to become a stay-at-home dad, when I taught stoplight paragraphs, and it all just fell into place for me. It was a simple way to stay on track, and bring everything back to the main idea.

Now, you might ask yourself, "What does this have to do with anything?" Not much. It was on my mind, and I wanted to write something! And now I have.

Here's pictures of my kids!

The boy loves slides!

DanPar actually shared his toys with a stranger! The other kid's secret?
Lead off with "Hey, can I show you something cool with that shovel?"

DanPar demanded to push around his own cart.

After this day, his poo was literally purple.

Purple with red splotches.

Drained!

I feel a lot of things today! Here is the explanation for one:

Long ago, I thought there was only one type of tired, the kind that you needed sleep for. Then there was beat, like you'd just done something strenuous and needed to relax. But now that I am an adult, there are lots of different kinds! And today, I am drained.

I'm dreading dealing with one of my neighbors, who is bent on putting a band-aid on our shared fence that desperately needs replacement. So add a tally to the emotional exhaustion side.

This morning, I found that someone had gotten into my car, and rooted around the glove compartment and console. Nothing was stolen, and I'd just forgotten to lock it, but come on, guys. Don't break into cars.

My boys were in their room for four hours before they went to sleep. And for every line in the sand I drew, they kept crossing it. So, each in a different step, I took their toys, books, rug, and extra blankets away, making them cry. But I warned them I would do these things. And I don't back down. But it's so tough to enforce things on people you love.

I made an open-the-flap card for my other neighbors, who just moved in last week! It was fun to think up, but my heart really wasn't in it when I did it, so I sort of just forced myself to do it, which is unpleasant, although I'm still happy I did it.

I've got a job, and it's to edit a book! But the deadline for it recently got moved up, so all of a sudden, it's demanding more time from me to get done, and the author is making revisions faster than I can edit! I'm still proud of my doing it, but it's rough.

For some reason, expecting a baby in October isn't nearly as stressful as I'd expect it to be? Honestly, I see it as a "I just need to make it to THEN" thing, because at that point, well, everything's going to be different. The worries of today will be tiny in comparison.

I guess it's just nice to write down all these thoughts. I'm still drained, but there's an order to the things now.

How about some nice things!

Hodey and I have been co-writing this story, and it's great. To be honest, it's the reason I've fallen behind with my editing. Writing it is so much fun, because, in the rules of the writing, it's all for fun, and we can change anything later.

Coffee is great. I may be a snob, though. I've actually considered bringing my own pot of coffee to Cousin Camp because I like my coffee so much more than anyone else's. But it's still a huge plus, because it's great to love and enjoy things.

Speaking of which, Cousin Camp! My boys have loved spending a couple mornings a week playing with their cousins! It's been a lot of fun, and it's been forcing all three of us into regular socializing.

I'm under 200 pounds! I'm in the Hundo-Club! I know I tend to eat more when I'm stressed, but after the last couple months, my stressed eating is just how I used to eat normally! I've raised my own standards!

I love my boys. I really do. The reason I had to take their things away from their room is because they truly need to sleep, for their own well-being. DanPar loses his mind if he doesn't get at least half an hour's rest. But it wasn't like they were being bad. They were disobedient because they just wanted to play with each other! Nothing mean. Nothing too destructive. They just love fun.

Cherries. I bought some because DanPar wanted some, but I can't think of a single way for him to responsibly eat them. So now I stash them behind the blueberries in the fridge, and bring them out as my own snack! And yes, I will eat the entire two-pound bag I bought.

And here's the big one.

More and more, I feel like I'm seeing more clearly the person who I want to be. I want to make games, I want to read more, and I want to be friendly in any circumstance. I can't just drop the things that stress me out, but I can respond to them in a way that I would find admirable. Don't respond angrily to the bad-fence neighbors, even when they get mean. Be friendly to the new neighbors, and offer anything they need. Be vulnerable, and be honest with those vulnerabilities, and be proud of being true to who you are. Learn what strategies help me lose weight, and share them. Write fearlessly, even if it's badly. When you're frustrated or angry at your kids, hold them and hug them and tell them that you love them, because that's what's most important, and then explain what is making you feel that way. Get to work, even when you don't feel like it. If my diet is any sign, I've shown that I can raise my standards without my knowledge.

All right, that's about that. My life is good. I am drained, but I love who I am, and I love who I want to be.

Hundo-City!

I am nearly there, and it's a bit surreal. I am almost under 200 pounds, which hasn't happened since ROTC in college, almost 10 years ago.
It's been a weird journey from the beginning, so let's start there.

The beginning: Early May-ish.
For the first few months of the year, I'd been half-assing a diet. It was more like "I'll kind of eat healthy, unless I don't feel like it." But one morning, I woke up, and I just thought, "Maybe I'll just eat less today. And tomorrow. And do that until I'm a good weight." I was 225 pounds then.
To me, the weirdness of it is that there was no ceremony. Nothing inspired me other than, "Meh, why not?" And for the next few weeks, I realized I wasn't suffering. I was hungry, sure, but it wasn't too bad.
So I'd eat not much more than chicken and vegetables, and call it a day. DanPar and Crash often ate more calories than I did.

Bad advice: Late May-ish.
This is about when I started telling people, "Hey, I've lost 15 pounds in the last three weeks!" And it was true! I was 210, and I could feel it. Walking around just felt a tiny bit easier. I started to see myself like I was: super handsome, and a magnificent thing to behold. (I'm kidding, but I really did think of myself as extraordinarily good-looking at the time.) And then, like Wile E. Coyote noticing the nothing beneath him, it started to hurt when I started to see results. This is when I remembered some bad advice I'd learned long ago: Try and enjoy hunger pangs. It's a bit sadistic, but it worked. I wouldn't ignore my hunger, I'd feel it, and feel proud.
This is probably an unhealthy relationship with pain and uneasy feelings, but it works. Can't recommend it, though.


Good advice: Early June-ish.
So, how can we satisfy hunger for less calories? That's the million dollar question that I've got a bunch of responses for. And here's what I've got:
- Diet root beer. It doesn't destroy that sweet tooth, but it helps quiet it down. I've stashed some in the corner of the basement, so the kids don't want to drink soda.
- High protein, low carb, not too much fat. These are the macronutrients. Protein is what your body wants. You don't have protein, you lose muscle. You want low carbs so that you burn the fat you've got.
- Count calories. I know what I'm looking at in food. I could be better, more vigilant, in counting calories, but I'm relatively aware of how many calories I'm tossing into my system.
- Bubble gum. Sometimes I just want something good in my mouth. And let me tell you, that sugar-free stuff doesn't always make the cut. But the sugar-ful gum? It's delicious, and it's still much healthier than stuffing my face with anything else.

Battleground: Now.
It's tough. This is a point that I honestly never saw myself getting to. I figured I'd just always be over 200 pounds. BMI says I should be 190, and I thought that was a load of horse dung. Maybe it still is, but it's within reach. I'm slimming down. I've still got a belly, but I've got less of one. But I'm still tempted by everything I see. There's a tube of mini-M&Ms in the basement right now that, honestly, I'm considering dumping down my gullet.
Writing about it helps, although it certainly doesn't set anything to order. It's a messy, helter-skelter, topsy-turvy, harum-scarum gathering of capricious attitudes and questionable advice, but it's resulted in my losing 25 pounds! Earlier this year, I was categorized as Obese, which is over 230 pounds for my height. Now I'm approaching the lower end of Overweight.

And hey, here goes nothing!

(Hundo-City is what I'm calling the club of people who have achieved weight loss to the point of one-hundred-something, as opposed to two-hundred-something.)

I'm sure it's just me, but I think my boys look SO COOL with backwards caps

Snacks and smiles!