Mercury Doing Backflips

Last Friday, Daniel was being stubborn. And when Daniel does stubborn, he doesn't half-ass it. He was hiding under his table, out of sight from his class, refusing to even write the next letter (it was the "n" in "I can"). And I'm trying something new, where I don't punish. Because that has never worked. Instead, I've been telling him, "Okay, but you don't get to play Minecraft until you write this sentence." And I feel pretty good about that? Like MAN, I cannot WAIT until the responsibility of motivating education is off my plate. A school environment would do wonders for this kid. As it is, I have a hard time keeping Echo from running around naked in the background.

A strange side effect, though, is that DanPar has been doubling down on his stubbornness. So, all weekend, I had the assignment, the single-sentence assignment, ready to go. And every day, he's decided against doing the work, and instead finding other things to play with.

Which is... honestly kind of cool, although definitely not at all what I was trying to get from him. He'll decide that this sentence is SO LONG (it's not that long) that he'd rather get on shoes and play on the swings.

...oh darn?

The boys have all been pretty emotionally taxing. Crash screeches, Echo clings, and DanPar doom spirals. It's a lot to handle. Jessi and I have started spending our free time doing awesome productive creative things, like writing and drawing, but on rough days, which aren't uncommon, sometimes we'll just collapse at the end of the day.

It's gonna get better, right? The boys are just so much right now. Echo's young, he'll grow out of it. Daniel will go to school, and we won't have to be his everything. And the weather is getting warmer; we'll be able to send the boys outside, so at least when Crash screams, it won't be in a contained space!

But I'm very proud of my boys. The basement's a mess, but it's a mess of Duplos and Legos and Megablox and wooden train tracks and all sorts of fun building projects. I wish they'd clean up what they aren't playing with, but more than any of that, I'm just so darn glad that they're building, being creative, and sharing all their creative energy with each other and their cousins!

I caught Crash Boy singing Wellerman the other day, and that's AWESOME. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9A6XcFE4CL8

Echo keeps getting more and more capable with his sentences, participating very well in our nightly "What was your favorite part of the day?" (He used to just say Jaina and Josie, no matter what actually happened that day.) And sure, he's clingy, but when he snuggles up in our bed the middle of every night, I know it'll be one of those things I might miss one day.

These boys.

This sweet boy refused to nap!

Aunt Jess with all those kids!

Rolling balls off the roof with Grandpa Bill!

All these kids on a tire swing!

Dyeing eggs!

Easter egg collection!

Miss Susan dropped off a bag full of sweets!

Snow!

 Yesterday was a snow day for all the schools! ...except ours, because it's online, and whoever makes decisions like this does not like children.

That didn't stop us from making the most of the last couple snowy days! My goodness, though. I'm beat. Crash Boy slammed into me boot-first right in my leg, so I've been limping! (But I did shoot out my leg so he wouldn't hit Echo, so at least it's a heroic kind of injury.) And I'm sooooo tired, and don't want to do anything.

It takes a lot to do what I think is right for my boys. Ugh. Blah. Blah and ugh. I'm hurt, I'm sore, I'm tired, and tomorrow is another day.

One cool snowman! Mostly Aunt Jessica's doing, but I contributed the shades and smile!

Woody's youth!

 It's been a while since I've felt young, but today? I feel young. I've got some stubble that looks out of place on me, and sure, I'm balding, but my face just looks light!

I think I've been doing a good job trying to keep myself up. And that's something! It's been hard. Especially since Echo turned two, and decided to start screaming (SO LOUD) about everything that upsets him, which now includes when his brothers don't let him steal their toys.

They're a handful! And they're hard. Crash Boy has apparently forgotten how to poo in the potty, and Daniel loses his cool more often than he should, growling, hitting himself, and just being short-tempered.

I try to keep my head screwed on right. I try to take care of myself, and I try to make time to clean the house (a thing I like to do!) while the kids are around. They're demanding, but they're used to me and Jessi telling them no, that we're busy.

That all said, yesterday, Daniel and I played a little game with Legos, each of us playing a character from the show Grizzy and the Lemmings (like a modern day Wile E Coyote and Roadrunner). And doggone it, it just felt good to be making stuff up with Legos.

Having kids young is awesome! I can keep up with them, and I feel like I've still got vim and vigor! Although, at the end of the day, I'm still exhausted. Being the parent of three young boys takes all I've got and then some!

But doggone it, I'm important, too, and I do what I can to feel like a human being. I've got my editing business, which can't really grow any larger, because I don't have much time for more! I've been doing my positive nonsense, my Little Delights, as a practice in positivity, a way to get people talking, and a way to just have a thing that's mine. I've got Dungeons and Dragons, and I've got my own campaign that I'm running, and all my players say that it's a ton of fun!

This is a big pat on the back for me, because I'm keeping my chin up, even when I'm stressed. And I know I'm stressed. My sweet boy DanPar, he was reading a book on emotions, and when he came to "stressed", he was like, "Hey, that's what Dad is all the time!" Hahaha, oh, sweet boy. I'm rather proud that he knows, because it's important to name one's feelings.

I'm stressed, yes, but I'm staying positive, by gum, and that's nothing to sniff at! I feel like I'm living my life, and in these times, when it's hard to justify getting out of the house, and most my energy is spent keeping up with the little ones, I feel great about it!

DanPar taught Crash how to swing on a swing when we weren't looking!

The boys playing Sorry! with Mama. DanPar's getting a bit silly with it.

This sort of thing gives me hope. Echo threw a rock at Daniel while he was on the swing, and after a little cry, Daniel laughed about it and commemorated the occasion in chalk!

Happy goobers!

Echo's ready to cause havoc with the unpacked Ikea shelves!

That smile. He's a mischievous little rascal, but he's at least a cute mischievous little rascal!

Crash Boy made his own "witch's hat"!

I've got my game shirt on! One of these days, I plan on being muscular, because I'd love to be the hunky nerd who plays Dungeons and Dragons.

I act with more patience than I actually have, and speak with more positivity than I've actually got. I used to dislike the phrase "fake it 'til you make it", but when it comes to my attitude, that's a good half of it. The other half is all procedure and discipline. When I feel like I might lose my cool, I wiggle my toes and pay attention to them for a little bit. I always keep a book nearby so I don't just zone out on the Internet. I have a list of friends who I want to make sure I don't lose touch with, and I will sit down and bang out an email to make sure I don't! I want to get myself into the routine of being a better person than I am right now. After all, that's how I grow into those big shoes!

Writing!

 I was talking to Bucky just yesterday, and yeah, we've both got that gene that lets us come up with stories on the spot. Wacky, zany, fun stories, and the ability to tie them in a neat bow.

But MAN, I just can't write a story that I want to for the life of me. Like, I can sit and pound out words, but the words make me dread the time that I'll have to go back and read through it all. I'm worried my trained editor's eye will be a little too judgmental on my own stuff!

But just yesterday, I picked up a little game, a one-player rpg where you draw cards from a deck, and they determine what your little adventurer encounters, where they are, what they find, and you write a journal about it. And I LOVE it. Because there's no plot, there's just Remi, wandering around a magical continent and meeting all kinds of people that, thanks to that aforementioned quirk, are all too easy to populate. I can create a character from nothing and make them unique, and then, with the next draw of cards, they'll be in the rear view!

It's the sort of skill that I have enjoyed, and I wish it could easily translate into the full-on books that I want to someday write.

One thing I have a fun time coming up with, are what I call concepts. Things that make a scene interesting on their face, even if the words (my words especially) fail to live up to all the interesting things I feel like I have to say.

So, for example, a concept for one scene is: A man finds a snooper going through his stuff, and he captures him. But he recognizes that this snooper is someone he promised an old friend to give an artifact to. So, he's got the strange situation where he's hostile towards the intruder, but at the end, he has to be like, "Oh yeah, and your dad told me to give you this."

Or, an overarching concept of the book is: The main character has a handful of superpowers; however, her ultimate goal is to get rid of these superpowers. So, instead of her getting stronger as the forces of badness mount against her, she's actively getting weaker; I guess someone needs to grow in ways other than her raw power, huh?

I love writing, and I love reading. And it feels good when I produce something that I feel is just halfway passable. The Adventurer journal is boatloads of fun!

Here are my boys making silly faces!

Working on the Matte Biscuit!

 I love this house. It's great for entertaining, and with the nine kids all wandering through and throughout everywhere (I've found the basement door leading outside open all the time!), it's a source of pride how often all the kids end up here.

Recently, I've tried to have some crafty thing on hand to do. We've never really had much of a problem with the boys playing videogames, but with all the cousins around, whenever one of them wants to play, everyone gets in on it! And while it's awesome they can all grab a controller and get on it, I want to make sure they're getting their imagination exercised.

Thankfully, they love building with Legos. DanPar especially has been having a great time building dungeons, and I love how quickly they can adapt whatever scenario they're playing in to include each other. They are sweet in that they always want to include each other. Just yesterday they had a Lego tower building competition!

Our house is always in the middle of three or more projects. And I accepted that as part of my vows, I believe! I'm very tired, but it's so nice every time I step back and look at all that's been done. Especially as we've been playing catch-up with the others in the Loft Club, who had a couple months' head start!

I could use some more free time; I always feel like whenever I've got time without the boys, I should either be doing something with them or sleeping. Life is still tough. It's getting better, and it's so nice to see it getting built up better and better, but I've been conscious of the time passing me by. I have very little energy nowadays, and any energy I build up is quickly allocated to something that needs to be done. Lots of things need to be done. It drags me down how little is left for everything else.

Uuuugh. I'm looking forward to the wintry months. Hopefully I'll be able to get through them without being too busy. I feel like I'm always trying to keep the house clean, the boys fed, the laundry going, and even then, I sometimes fall behind.

It's nice to not be doing this alone; Jessi helps whenever I ask, and I'm surrounded by kind family who are all going through similar situations. It's less tumultuous to know that this is the house that will be our home for, well, forever as far as I'm concerned! Someday, I'll be caught up and rested. Not a priority right now? Hurts to say it, but yeah, I guess that's the case.

Well, downer Woody has had a lot to say, and you know what, that's fair. I wouldn't expect anyone to suck it up and act like all is well around me, and I won't hold myself to any different standard. But you know what? Every day begins with a great cup of coffee, and it's always a good start to the day.

I'm doing what I can to keep it together while also moving forward.

Things are getting there. Things are getting better. It's a shame that we can't just fix everything in one go. Everything's a process.

I'm starting up a new Dungeons and Dragons campaign with Andrew and some of his friends. I think it's going to be a lot of fun! I'm the Dungeonmaster, and I'm in the mood to provide one of the greatest gametime experiences these guys have ever had! I'm a bit anxious because I feel like it's this huge thing for me, and it might not be for them! To me, it's the ability to create stories with friends! But maybe they just want to pretend that they can smash giant spiders. And you know what? That's okay. I just need to practice not pushing them into it.

Maybe I'm the only one looking forward to the winter, but oh, I am! I like chilly weather, especially with my tasty coffee, a warm home, and fun games to play with people I like!

Dad and Daniel do Kindergarten!

 We're through one week of Kindergarten, and so far, so okay! DanPar started off really shy, and, well, he's still shy, but at least he's willing to sit in front of the camera now!

DanPar's first class, lying on the ground away from the computer.

He's very quiet, very hesitant to talk, but last time he confided in me that he did want to share his drawing of what makes him special, so I told him to raise his hand. He barely raised it; it was under his shoulder. But Ms. Furay (pronounced "fury") noticed it, and Daniel talked all about his exploding creeper shirt, how much he likes Cap'n Crunch, and his four-layer rainbow dice!

He's my special guy!

He's been doing better each day; I've been next to him every time, as we start with small 30-minute classes. We'll see how he does this week, when we extend them to 90 minutes! I may have to leave to take care of the others as we go; we'll see!

Very much improved!

Well, there's nothing like Kindergarten to get my own thoughts on track. It's nice to think about those very fundamental concepts, and it's been, I don't know, therapeutic? We talked about what to do when you're worried (talk about it), and what makes us special! For me, it's that I like Dungeons and Dragons, I listen to NPR, I like spicy things, and I help people see that they belong and that they matter. (That last one is sort of my personal superpower.)

There was a lesson on hopes and dreams, and DanPar drew himself fighting a zombie. And that's all right by me. Maybe I could make a game where he pretends to do different jobs when he grows up. But what's important to me now is that he knows how to play nice, be nice, and follow directions when asked by an adult in charge. He's my very good boy.

He's doing a good job, and it's fun for me to sit down and participate in all of their activities!

It's a crazy world, it's not the Kindergarten we were all asking for, but by gum, it's the Kindergarten we've got, and we're making the most of it! I am proud of my boy.

New house in a week!

So, my last post was a bit gloomy-doomy and, uh, testes-westes, but hey, I was afraid, so fine. As it is, I still feel some strain if I've been on my feet for a while, and they are extremely sensitive! But after a week of steroids, the swelling is almost gone, and I'm feeling better about the whole situation.

So it's time to DREAM!!!!

About the new house!

Okay, I want our house to be super inviting, super nice, and super fun.

Inviting:

- Upon entering the first time, people know where to put their shoes, where to get a glass of water, where to get a snack, and where to get some washcloths. (Ever make a mess at someone's house and not know where the stuff to clean it up is?) I want things to be nice, but not to feel like you're not allowed to kick your feet up, lest you leave a fingerprint.

Nice:

- Keep the floor level area tidy, have a place for everything and keep everything in its place. Sure, there will most likely be a place for "here's stuff I'll have to get to but I can't right now", but it'll be someplace where it looks nice. And the kids' toy boxes will have labels! And hey, I could do with a stick vacuum to use after every meal!

Fun:

- I want activities to be around, even if they're a bit hidden. Crossword puzzles in the coffee table; jigsaw puzzles next to books on a shelf; interactive pictures on the wall. Oh, and if you go upstairs? Welcome to the loft, aka FUN TIME METROPOLIS CITY EXTREEEEEEEME!!!! Art supplies, books galore, toys toys toys!

I look forward to living in my own house, making my own rules, telling my boys that I love how much fun they're having. They are wonderful boys, and I'm now just so excited to get to work on the house where they're going to grow up!

Sweet Echo loves chalk, which he calls "color", and DanPar loves putting powdered chalk onto his face!

Some sweet guys just playing at the church park!

DanPar made a little DanPar pancake with red pickleball shoes!

Echo likes pancakes! Especially with chocolate chips and pancakes!

Crash Boy tends to only eat the peanut butter and chocolate off the top... must be why he's so sweet!

I made the boys as adults in The Sims 4!

Playing with some boxes!

Fishing pole grappling hooks are the only things keeping them from sliding down into the quicksand!!!

Our very short paper chain! Only a few days left, we can make it!

Hanging out at Kip's house, playing with the big pool, splashing around!

I'll remember the view, that's for sure!

I'm working on another list of things I'm going to remember from this summer! It's been a crazy summer, and by golly, I'm going to remember the good stuff!