1 of me, 2 of them

It used to be just DanPar and me, up until the last few months. It's one of the strangest feelings I've ever felt, seeing that you are no longer as much of a friend as you are a parent.

We'd go out and about, laughing, playing, talking, and when Crash Boy was born, he'd just come along with. But the outing was centered around Daniel and me.

It's changed now.

At Walmart, DanPar will ask me to take Baby Crash out to look at the fish. When the little little guy is napping, Daniel will try and sneak in his room to wake him up. And he loves picking out jammies for his little brother, and still celebrates when he rolls over, even though he's been doing that for months now.

 And I know it's all good, and all healthy, and when I tear up thinking about it, it's because I'm so happy with how these boys are growing up. It's just still a little sad, because my job is not so much "friend" as it is "friend-maker". I set out areas where they can play with the same toys. Daniel gives his little brother a rotation of Duplos for him to chew on, while he commands me to make steps out of blocks for him to roll doomed Duplos down. DanPar gives Crash books to read, and waits patiently to the side as I read them to Baby Crash, before telling me to read them again.

I will sacrifice my own time to go outside, pick up the sticks he's thrown, and scatter them on one side of the yard, because Daniel loves to go find them over and over again, every day, and show them to Crash Boy.
These boys are good boys. And even though it isn't just the two of us anymore, and it's not exactly going to be the three of us until they're older, I like to picture the two of them together, happy, while I wrap large arms around them, fostering fraternal love.
Perhaps the sweetest moment was a couple weeks ago, when Daniel was going to bed, and as we picked up Crash Boy from the pillow reserved for giving him hugs and kisses, Daniel said, "Baby Crash loves Daniel."
They're growing up. It doesn't feel fast, not yet, but it's an inevitable process that I know we're all going to go through, no matter what.

I am reminded of a famous tweet in my circles. "Please go play with your brother. That's basically the reason we had him."