Jessi and I are awesome.
We've been married for three years, and with such a strong and friendly bond, any two people living in the same house will eventually create their own language. I just wanted to share a few of our favorite expressions.
"Blankets!"
This term refers to accidental spousal abuse, especially in the negotiation of sheets and comforters. We've had this term ever since we shared an apartment, and it's still used to this day.
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| Blankets-ing since 2011! |
"kick his ass"
As in, "We're going to the pool today. Man, I hope it kicks his ass."
When we want something to kick DanPar's ass, we mean that it shuts him down for several hours. We have important things to do when he's asleep! (Most likely, reading or eating something unaccompanied or napping.)
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| Watching rocket launches is tiring. |
"The vortex"
I'm not sure how it works, but right at the top of our stairs, there is one magical spot where you can smell the entire house. Seriously, you couldn't smell the cookies baking any better if your nose were in the oven door. Whether pleasant or unpleasant, this spot of our house is the olfactory gathering place of all smells.
"What kind of house are you running?"
My wife is very sweet. But in my hectic life of taking care of a house and a child (and soon
another child), some things just get plain forgotten. So, whenever we run out of cheese, or I forgot to make tea, or our favorite pan (we named it Paco) is dirty, she'll ask me this question. It's usually answered with an exhausted gaze, and then we smile.
She's incredible, y'all.
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| Out of booze, Dad... |
"Nice."
DanPar is a rowdy boy. He loves to run into thing, smack things, and throw hard objects at things. In case you haven't heard, next month we are getting a very special thing (baby!) that we would rather he not do any of these things to. So, we started telling him to be "nice" to people, and demonstrate with soft petting.
Unfortunately, he's, you know, ONE. So to him, the entire action of rubbing something is the meaning of "nice". And so, fist full of yogurt, he'll turn to the back of his chair, and smear it all over, saying, "niiiiiiiiice."
But hey, if that's what it takes for him to not hit his baby brother, then so be it. We'll cross that bridge of him spreading peanut butter on Crash to be "nice" when we come to it.
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| Careful, he's trying to be nice!!! |
"Baby crack"
No kidding, just the other day we saw a couple with that yellow irresistible plastic canister, and when DanPar waddled up, chanting "Please! Please! Please!", they called it the same thing. It's baby crack, and if you're familiar with the practice of keeping dog treats to befriend any pooch, you know the concept.
But like I've said, the kid started catching onto words (who the heck taught you "table"???) naturally, so we took the intelligent course and started calling it "baby
snack", at least when he's in the room.
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| So many flavors of crack! |
"Puzzles?"
It all started two Christmases ago, when Mom gave us four books of puzzles. Well, this is when DanPar was less than a month old, so we needed
something to keep our brains afloat when we were unwillingly awake. Thus: Puzzles. It's become a nightly routine to finish one or two crosswords before bed. And when we're getting tired, one of us will look at the other, and say, "Puzzles?"
Currently, and I'm not sure why, but the
Denver Post has been dropping off newspapers twice a week. We feel pretty bad that all of it goes straight into the recycling bin except for half of one page. (Once I'm done with the funnies, of course.)
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| Always a good gift for us! |
I'm sure there's more and more, and some of it is just quoting our favorite stuff, but here's to couple and family culture!
