Dad Fashion: morning fitness!

     Just before my awesome and beautiful wife went back to work, I had a check-up with my doctor.  I told him about my life, we commiserated over all the parts to clean with the Dr. Brown brand bottles, and he had some bloodwork done.  I had some high cholesterol, so he told me to take fish oil three times a day, and asked me what exercise I was doing.  With much pride, I told him that this year, I had been successful in doing 50 push-ups a day, and was in the middle of increasing that number.

     He gave me his best unimpressed doctor face, and said, "Well, that's great, but it doesn't matter to me what strength training you're doing.  What cardio are you doing daily?"  So, I tried to tell him that we went on walks sometimes, but I was just doing my best to embellish my true answer, "Nothing."  I knew that I was going to have a hard time finding exercise to do when I spend almost all day with a baby on my chest.  I chose push-ups for two reasons: One, they're fast to crank out when you set the kiddo down and easy to make harder, and Two, I know I'm no thin mint.  The idea was, if I can get my upper torso all buff and muscly, it'll be easier to overlook my gelatinous belly.

     So, I've decided to share with you my tips for stay-at-home diet and fitness!  2 exercises and 2 meals for each of the three standard parts of the day, presented by me and my Star Fox pals!

Let's start with the morning!

Morning exercises:
     As a parent, there's nothing I want more than to give my child a good life.  I want to model for him what it means to be fit, to be strong, and to be disciplined.  Also, it wouldn't hurt if I just so happened to look like a stud muffin for his mom.  So, I've come up a few exercises that can be done without any other equipment other than a baby for the morning, to get you up and running for the day!


Exercise #1: Do a barrel roll!

     Nothing's more fun for a baby than seeing his awesome dad's awesome face and flying through the sky.  You roll back, and kick your legs up, holding the kiddo the same distance from your face the whole time.

     Not feeling like you're working out your arms enough?  Use your older brother!
Want to feel the Star Fox 64 immersion?  Train a hare to tell you what to do!
Don't have a baby?  A watermelon or medicine ball will do!  Or nothing!


Exercise #2:  What a lunge!

     Lunges.  You see them, you're like, "Oh, that seems easy."  Then you see how useful they are in a workout, and you're like, "Oh, count me in!"  Then you do it for a few minutes, and you're like, "Oh, okay, I'm done now."  Lunges are good for you.  Do them with a baby.

Breakfast!
     If you're a full-time parent of a newborn, or are allergic to spoons, you have an innate problem with any food that may be less-than solid.  I can't rely on my kiddo's naps.  He sort of has them when he has them, and so, very often, I find myself hungry, but with a DanPar strapped to my chest.
SO.  Healthy food that's easy to prepare!


Meal #1:  Protein au lait

     What better way to start your day than with a freshly brewed cup of coffee with as much protein as five eggs?  Just before we found out that we were expecting a DanPar, Jessi and I were on this diet that was all about high protein, low fat, and low carbs.  It was tough, but it sure worked.  We're off it, but a few staples still exist here and there.  This is one of them.

     Here's what you do:

1. Pour yourself a cup of coffee.  How much?  I don't know...however much you feel like drinking!

2. Mix in a scoop of protein powder.  I prefer the chocolate for coffee, but the vanilla's pretty versatile. 

3. Add milk so that you can actually call it "au lait".  This part's optional, but hey, I like milk.

I've been known to add fiber powder and cinnamon to my powder mix, because I'm awesome.


Meal #2:  Stay-at-homelette

     So, I'm sure you're wondering two things.  1, "How can I cook eggs easily with a kid?" and 2, "How do I pronounce this thing you're telling me to cook?"
     The answer to #1?  Microwave.  Find a bowl with a large flat bottom, put some beaten eggs in it, and microwave it 30 seconds at a time.  The answer to #2?  No idea.  Say what feels right.

     Here's what you do:

1. Oil your plate.  Seriously.  Stuck eggs suck to clean up.

2. Put some eggs in, beat them, (or buy liquid eggs,) and add salt, pepper, chili powder, etc.  You should have eggs  about half a centimeter deep in there.

3. Microwave it for 30 seconds.  Stir.  Do it again.  And again.  And then stop when they look edible-ish.

4. Add cheese, ham, spinach, or whatever's been taking up too much space in your fridge.

5. Fold it as best as you can.  It won't be pretty.  But no one can judge you.

Of course, you can add ketchup or salsa or sour cream on top, but be careful!  More than once, my wife has picked dried tomato sauce off DanPar's head.

See that kid?  That's a kid who knows the value of balancing exercise and naps.